The Symbolism of Fall and Bird Molting in My Story

Shedding more than _just_ my uterine lining this month

You made it past the subtitle! I love that for us!! 💛

I started writing this newsletter with back-to-school in mind and how fall is the season of change - a harbinger of change and transformation, says this blog. However, if I am being honest with you, as someone born and raised in India, where the school year is usually from March to April, the symbolism behind the fall season doesn’t quite resonate with me. I KNOW!!

Nonetheless, molting, or shedding, is something I can get behind at this time of the year. You're not alone if this is your first time hearing about it. Let me back up a little. I set up a couple of birdfeeders in the backyard earlier this summer. It took a little time, but eventually, I could see a variety of birds from my living room. 

(Side note: While there are conflicting opinions on bird feeding and whether or not you should have birdfeeders, watching those birdies brings me immense joy, so I continue to refill those feeders every week.)

Earlier this week, I saw a bird looking pretty rough, like it had been in a war, and it had me concerned. I was getting ready to fight some cats, but my partner mentioned to me that it was that time of the year for them birdies. Now, not sure if I zoned out when this was being taught in school, or my ADHD brain just can’t remember shit (it is probably the latter), but I completely forgot about this unique phenomenon!

Turns out, most birds shed their feathers once or twice a year to maintain their shiny plumage. According to my most favorite source of bird-related information, the National Audubon Society (duh!):

As complex and capable as feathers are, they don't last forever: They begin to break down after some time, forcing its owner to replace them. As a result, a bird’s appearance may radically change through the molting period—or just look odd and patchy. 

You can read it in detail here. The article mentions molting as one of the vital parts of bird life and advises us to “EMBRACE THE MOLT”. 

Birds are fascinating to me. I mean, listen to this, 

Some birds go through a complete molt during this time, after they're done mating, nesting, and tending to their chicks, but before they embark on their southbound migrations.

Are you kidding me??!! 🤯

Molting happens to ensure that these birds are in their top-shape before they embark on the next challenge of their life and take on this momentous journey to find their home for the next season.

Photo by Dulcey Lima on Unsplash

Now, it is fair to ask why I am sharing my infatuation with birds with you, or what is the point of going over this basic concept you might have read about in school?

Here’s the thing: you know that feeling of being on the edge of a cliff with four heavy grocery bags while trying to control two dogs pulling on their leash, all the while holding your phone between your head and shoulder, and receiving a frantic call from a loved one? You know what I am talking about, right? You don’t know how or why you decided to do all those things or carry all these heavy things around simultaneously, but now you are drowning under the weight of it all. You can’t breathe, but there is no way you are going to find the energy to come up for air. It is a lot of work, so let’s just make do with the shallow breaths for now. 

That is how I have been feeling for a while.

I wrote about feeling something similar in July. In fact, I even took some time away from this newsletter, thinking that would fix it all. How am I back to that same place in less than two months? Not sure about you, but mental fatigue at THIS frequency doesn’t seem sustainable to me.

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With birds and their molting as my inspiration, I found myself thinking about my routine and general day-to-day. I know that I don’t want to feel like I am always tinkering on the edge of overwhelm or burnout. SO, what needs to shift? What needs to happen for me to find a certain level of sanity in my life that feels like a chaotic hamster wheel?

So, what does embracing the molt mean for me?

There was a time when I enjoyed my hobbies. My “side-projects” (this Substack is only one of them) brought me a lot of joy. Between my 200+ houseplants (I don’t know the exact number. I am superstitious about counting them), growing my own food (both indoors and outdoors), working on a podcast (not related to ADHD. It is about women in tech. Let me know if you are curious about it or want to work with me on it. I need HEEEELP!), and painting, my plate has been overflowing for quite a few months now. I have to credit my sister for this, but given the cards I have been dealt, it is time to change things to find a modicum of sanity (her words, not mine). They are genuinely fantastic cards, by the way. REALLY FANTASTIC! My 16-year-old self could not even imagine having these cards one day; I digress.

I want to clarify that I have no intention of ending this Substack or discontinuing my newsletter writing and sharing with you. I genuinely enjoy it! However, I often experience anxiety and nervousness every Monday when I am unable to find time to write during the weekend, which happens more often than I would like to admit. This seems unwarranted and not particularly beneficial for my mental well-being.

Furthermore, I expect myself to be creative and productive every Monday and Tuesday in a precise way to make sure that I can create something worthy of your time and energy that same Thursday, which goes against everything I write about in this newsletter. Practice self-compassion, I say. No is a complete sentence, I say. Make mistakes and ditch perfection, I say. Don’t judge yourself, I say. Yet, I don’t practice it as often as I should!

In order to find the joy and contentment in my hobbies that I once did, I need to make sure that I don’t keep filling up my plate like I am at an all-you-can-eat buffet of creative work. That seems dramatic, but I think that is the perfect way to describe this year for me.

I plan to spend the rest of September asking for help or hiring people to help me with my projects. Much like the birds, it’s the molting season here, y’all.

Time to shed some of the extra mental load to maintain sanity!

I am not expecting these shifts to solve everything magically. These are probably just a starting point, but I am keeping my mind open, listening to my body without judgment, and preparing myself for these changes.

While back-to-school might have meant new journals, pens, books, or folders, I am using it as an opportunity to try out some new changes and let go of the old notions of productivity, especially regarding my creative projects. What does back-to-school mean to you? Are you shedding some metaphorical feathers this season to maintain your shine? I would love to hear about it in the comments below!